“The truth always carries the ambiguity of the words used to express it.”- Frank Herbert
I’m not going to attempt to write out the whirlwind of intense emotions, spiritual (something or other- no real word for it so lets say- awareness), and physiological reactions to the former two. Needless to say each moment has been a miracle.
Finished the antibiotics yesterday and have had the predictable digestive upset. 1.2 mmol today. Haven’t been particularly concerned with eating windows with the antibiotics. Same weight. Cough is on and off but I think it’s mostly due to all my neighbors burning their leaves. Smells like fall but not so helpful for someone recovering from bronchitis.
I’m experiencing extreme heart hunger. 10 out of 10. I have no physical desire to eat “comfort” foods or refined carbs at all but I deeply miss my family and Chicago (my forever home). I am, like almost every single person on the planet at the moment, isolated far away from my family. I have never gone this long without seeing them. This will be the first thanksgiving I will not go home. Since my husband works at a University there is not a chance we would risk either of us bringing covid home to my elderly parents.
Absolutely nothing sounds good to eat except certain dishes from restaurants from places my husband and I have lived. I also REALLY REALLY don’t want to cook anything. I want take out. But there is nothing here worth eating. I’d break keto in a second for something special but there just isn’t anything remotely in the sphere of worthiness within 300 miles.
I could make something spectacular from scratch myself, however, since I do all the cooking (and I do love cooking) I just don’t want to eat after I cook. If that makes any sense? Maybe it’s a professional chef thing?
My husband is looking for ways to make our first thanksgiving alone special. It’s remarkably sweet.
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. The fridge full of putrid food got to me … ugh. I appreciate all you had to say and it does make sense to me. I will say I went on the hunt a few weeks back to find fruit with seeds and there weren’t many, upsetting how much our food has been altered but perhaps you are right that it’s better than decaying meat … when I was pregnant the first thing I noticed was the smell of meat was so discusting and it was the only thing that made me gag the whole time I was pregnant, does make you realize the body knows what’s poisonous for us at least at that time in life.