It’s alright, I caved yesterday and finished what my daughter refused to eat. She is super picky and I still have a mental hang-up about wasted food. That is something I definitely need to work on going forward. So my new Day 1 will be 5/5/2023. I won’t give up, no no!
I hope and pray whatever the decision you have to make that you are able to just make the best decision for you. I feel the same way about my daughter’s dad. I’m still so embarrassed that I was that blind and naive to what he was actually about. I refuse to tell anyone that I was even involved with him, and I have moved hours away from where he is so I can just start all over.
I definitely feel you on the HUGE responsibility part. I’m literally doing it alone right now, and she is also on the autism spectrum, so that makes it much harder. Luckily I work from home and can manage, but she will require hired help and ABA therapy and speech therapy once I can afford it. I initially wanted to give her up for adoption so she could have 2 parents, but decided not to. Now I wish I had, if only to give her a better start. I honestly don’t plan on having another relationship or another child. I just want to relax the rest of my years in peace lol. I already have a 19 year old in college, so I’m 2 and done. I started early and had him in high school, then had plenty of hard relationship lessons in my years after that. Now I just want to be happy and peaceful going forward.
When I lost all of that weight the first time, I took a variety of classes at my local gym to keep my body confused. I took Spinning, barbell strength, Zumba and Pilates mostly, but I also tried all other classes to see what they were like. I do plan on joining a gym again once I get another car. I also walked alot around town and took the bus mostly, so I was always active in some way.
Right now I will be using a few DVDs (yes, I love and use them still lol) that I used also in the past that worked wonders. ChaLean Extreme , Turbo Jam, the old school Look Good Naked series, Zumba and more. I have quite a few, enough to get a full workout from home. I just need to find that motivation I had back then, especially since I still have to modify alot of the exercises. I would also make a super healthy green drink with my Nutribullet. I have everything I need, I just need to get my mentality and emotions back in order. Men are usually the ones that bulk with strength training, mainly due to their testosterone levels. We don’t have to worry about that so much, thank God.