Tara's 50 Day Water Fasting Journal

#1

May 12, 2021

Hey everyone! My name is Tara, and I am 7 days into my first 50 day water fast.

So far, I’ve been doing all of my journaling in a notebook (the old school way), but I’ve been so inspired by reading everyone else’s journals that I feel like putting this all out there in such a genuinely supportive community will keep me accountable and on track! So thank you all in advance for helping me succeed!

I am no stranger to fasting. I have been doing IF, ADF, and 5/2 on and off for the last 2+ years. My struggles are with consistency. I have a habit of starting out great, but then before I know it I’ve fallen off the wagon and I end up beating myself up about it to the point where I don’t even want to try again. Eventually I do though, and the vicious cycle continues.

This 50 day fast is not only about the much needed weight loss for me. It’s also about detoxifying my body AND my mind. It’s about proving to myself that I CAN overcome my history of self-sabotage, and that I CAN break my addictions to sugar and fast food.

I am currently 39 years old, but will turn 40 this July. My starting weight was 242.3 pounds. I am now at 231.7 pounds. My biggest hurdle this past week has been fighting the exhaustion, weakness, and lightheadedness. I dissolve some Pink Himalayan Salt in water and take that as needed, and I drink water with added electrolytes daily. I attend Jazzercise classes 4 times a week, but those have been admittedly rough this past week. I’m hoping once I hit the “coasting” phase, my energy levels will rebound and I can do well in class again. Until then, I’m just listening very closely to my body.

Once again, thank each and every one of you for your support and encouragement! I’m so happy to be here! Please don’t hesitate to unleash all your tips, tricks, and advice on me! In the meantime I’ll be watching all of @Yasemin’s YouTube videos. :grin:

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#2

Hi Tara! Welcome ! Congrats on 7 days ! That’s great!! I did 9 day water fast a few months back but that’s as far as I made it. You can do this Tara, keep going, do one hour at a time if need be … I wouldn’t be too concerned with working out during fasting if it was me, your body is working hard at cleaning all the toxins we eat and breathe everyday and dropping the excess weight … to me it’s ok to lay low and take it easy and let your body heal!!

I love this place, we are all on our own journey to health and healing and weight loss and can learn from each other and encourage each other !!! All our paths are just a little different but we are all going for the same goal … health! Keep posting and the best part is we can say anything and there dosnt appear to be any judgement and we can clear our head of stuff we ruminate on unnecessarily !! :slight_smile::bouquet::clinking_glasses:. I’m rooting for you Tara!!! You got this!!

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#3

Yessssssssssssssss :fire::fire::fire::fire:

I put a bunch of worksheet in the “tools” section for now!!

And also the playlists etc on my YouTube might help for a few of the days!!! :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: I have at least a year’s worth of daily videos up there hahaha!!! More coming soon as soon as baby comes :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye::sparkling_heart:

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#4

This is everyone not just you :kissing_heart: I’m sure all my feelings will come up after pregnancy :pray::sparkling_heart: Can’t wait to jump back in with all of you :heart_eyes:

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#5

The biggest thing in noticed about exercise (a bit like what our lovely @Stacia just said) is that we can lay low on exercise if it’s for the purpose of “accelerating weight loss” - then i just like to rest and heal BUT that being said, I also love moving and getting out of the house for slow walks when I’m fasting because it simply gets me out of the house, and honestly gets me in a good mood and kind of helps that euphoria kick in!!! You start to smell the fresh air, and hear the beautiful sounds of nature and wind, and feel the sun on your skin! It’s beautiful!!! If it keeps you busy, gets you out of the house and makes you feel good, keep going but don’t worry too much about the intensity, just go do your classes at lower intensity and enjoy it!!! :heart_eyes::heart_eyes:

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#6

Awesome comment about exercise and fresh air and euphoria ! :slight_smile: I sorta forget about all that (Haha) but it’s sooooo true !!! Just walks around the block is helpful for sure :slight_smile::two_hearts: love it

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#7

Hey @Stacia! I truly couldn’t have asked for a better first reply than that. You are AWESOME. :heart: It’s so empowering to know someone is in your corner. Thank you endlessly.

@Yasemin Thank you so much for that validation about my self-sabotaging ways. I’m really working hard to change that thought process!

Thank you BOTH for your advice on the exercise. You’re both absolutely right. Jazzercise is my “me time” - the only break I get from being at the service of someone else, be it coworkers, my husband, my kids, etc., but that doesn’t mean that my “me time” HAS to be Jazzercise. I live in the woods, I could certainly take some amazing nature walks any time I want! I will definitely start doing that.

Now for my journal: May 13,2021

My “new day” starts at 8:00 PM EST, which means as of this moment I am just starting Day 9. I’m still waiting for my ‘auto-pilot’ phase to kick in. I still get extremely hungry any time I smell food, even ones I never particularly liked before, and I’m tired most of the time. I’m ready for bed by 9:00 each night, and I have no desire to get up when my alarm goes off at 6:00. I’m so ready for my energy to come back!

I weigh myself every morning, (I like to track my stats), and this morning I weighed in at 230.6. I’m hopeful that I’ll hit the 220’s tomorrow morning, but I won’t let myself get discouraged if I don’t. The thought that I could potentially be back in one-derland before my 40th birthday is a dream I never thought would come true, but it’s a dream I fully plan to keep working towards! :crossed_fingers: :crossed_fingers:

What are your favorite ways to distract yourselves from the hunger/cravings?

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#8

Yaaaaa!!! 220’s here you come!!! I too am getting closer to seeing under 200… not there yet but the health I have gained (mentally and physically) quitting sugar and glutten has been worth a million right there. I don’t like to weigh as I get hung up on the number … I like to just see that I’m starting to feel better in my clothes and walking, going up the stairs, etc with wayyy more ease. Everyday I feel a little better … My goal is 128 … ahhh can’t wait to see that !! 1st goal under 200, 2nd 180 and on and on … we got this sister… keep going !!! :clinking_glasses::bouquet:

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#9

A stop sign pops up in my face. I ask myself will I feel better tomorrow knowing the choice I made today?

And then find something to occupy my head and keep busy. It really is mind over matter.

Now if I do feel truly ill, I will break a fast. I’m coming up on the previously dreaded day 17.5 right now and gearing my head to breeze right through it this time. I get to break my fast next Wednesday night. :blush:

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#10

@Stacia YAAAASSSS GIRL!!! We’ve ALL got this!!! You are seriously SUCH an inspiration!!!

@Miramar I LOVE that - asking myself how I’m going to feel tomorrow about the choices I make today, because I already know emphatically that I’ll be so upset with myself if I break this fast early just because I’m hungry on emotional.

As for my journal: May 14, 2021

The scale said 229.3 this morning!! WHAAAAAT!? :raised_hands:t2: However, even the smell of my cat’s wet food made me hungry this morning. :rofl: I know that will chill out in time, and I just keep telling myself that if I can push through all these absolutely absurd cravings, then surely I can push through all 50 days of this fast. Just so we’re clear, I was never in danger of eating cat food. :laughing:

The only other thing I’ve noticed is that I’ve had very vivid dreams the last four nights, and I’m someone who rarely ever dreams, so that’s been interesting. Of course, I’ve had two dreams about breaking my fast already. I woke up terrified both times thinking I actually had broken my fast. :woman_facepalming:t2::crazy_face:

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#11

Haha, the dreaded eating while on a fast dream.

I get some pretty vivid dreams as well. Oh! Yes, last week I think it was I met my dream man.

Sounds like you’re on your way to onderland! Go Tara Go!

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#12

Thank you so much!!! 30 pounds to lose before July 15th (the filthy 40th). I really hope I can do it!!!

Also, tell me more about this dream man!!! :heart:

#13

May 16, 2021

Hello again!

8:00 PM EST starts Day 12 for me. I am currently weighing in at 227.1. :raised_hands:t2: Not much else to report, otherwise. I just got some unflavored powdered electrolytes to add to my water in hopes of helping with the lightheadedness and general run-down feeling I’m still having. (So far the salts are only serving to make me run to the bathroom, if you know what I mean. :laughing:) The smell of food is still making me stomach-growling hungry. I distract myself by binge watching previous seasons of Hell’s Kitchen and My 600 Pound Life on Hulu. It’s working so far! Please recommend your favorite shows to binge on Hulu/Netflix/Amazon Prime!

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#14

I watched Hannibal. Seeing people eat other people can be a turn off from eating. :joy:

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#15

BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Genius. :rofl:

May 17, 2021

I weighed in at 226.0 this morning. I love that I’m averaging roughly a pound a day, but I’m wondering if I’m going to end up with loose skin from this…

Mental note to search for a collagen infused lotion sometime later today.

I also need to search for a toothpaste and mouthwash without sugar alcohols, as I feel fairly sure I’m spiking my insulin every morning and night. I’ve noticed I get super hungry first thing in the morning, and at night as I’m getting ready for bed. Definitely not a fan of that! If anyone has any recommendations for lotions or toothpaste/mouthwash, lay 'em on me! :grin:

Today is also my first day taking my new electrolyte supplements. Fingers crossed they help!!

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#16

You can make your own.

I use the powdered charcoal. Right now I have some I bought off Amazon that has mint extract and I think stevia? But I want to make my own with some baking soda added and maybe use xylitol instead as that helps kill the bad bacteria in your mouth.

There’s all kinds of recipes online.

I try also to avoid fluoride as it can raise havoc with the pineal gland from what I’ve heard.

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#17

May 20, 2021

Welp. My first setback has occurred. On Monday the 17th, I had a dentist appointment. After the work I needed was done, my dentist asked that I eat dinner that evening and call him in the morning if I was having any jaw pain or headaches when I chewed. I explained to him that I was currently fasting with the intended goal of making it to at least June 24th. He insisted that it was pertinent to correct any issues with my bite as soon as possible, which I begrudgingly understood.

I called my out-of-this-world supportive husband and vented to him about how (irrationally) upset I was about having to break my fast. He listened, praised my 12 day success, and reminded me that I could get right back on the wagon - no problem. Not knowing much about the refeed process, he brought me my favorite meal from my favorite Japanese restaurant for dinner Monday night. I ended up breaking my fast with broth that night, and then slowly nibbling on some cooked veggies on Tuesday, before finally finishing the rest of that meal yesterday.

I weigh 232.1 this morning. I am 13 hours into my new fast.

A couple things I learned from this speedbump:

1 - I became way too fixated on that “50 Day” goal. The fact that I wasn’t going to succeed on my first attempt at a 50 Day fast is the reason why I was so upset about having to break it. Really, it shouldn’t have been a big deal at all. In an attempt to circumvent that this time, I am not going to set a precise number goal. I am going to fast until either I need to eat for some other medical reason, or until my body tells me it’s ready to refeed. I set my LIFE app to 1,000 hours (which puts me breaking my fast at 11:45 AM on June 30th), but I’m going to try not to think about that number as a “goal”. If I make to then, great! If something happens and I don’t, great! (I may need some help with maintaining that mentality.)

2 - I need to work harder to give my successes more attention than I give to my “failures”, and to maybe reevaluate what I consider to be a “failure” in the first place. I know this will not be an overnight fix - nowhere close, but I need to work harder.

Oh, and one side note: that “unflavored” electrolyte powder I got is EFFING DISGUSTING!!! I tried it for the first time on Monday and it was all I could do to keep the first sip down. It was like trying to drink ground up chalk. :face_vomiting: Does anyone know if the gelatin capsules break a fast? I may need to try and supplement these electrolytes in a pill form. Hopefully they’ll be just as effective that way!

As always, thank you all for letting me vent. I can’t tell you how much this community has helped me already. :heart:

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#18

June 23, 2021

Welp. As I’m sure you all can imagine, I did not stay back on that wagon for long. Not only did I fall off the wagon, but I set that bitch on fire and kicked it off a cliff. Sigh.

BUT, I’m back. For real. I’m only 18 hours in, but I need to put my recommitment out there for my own accountability. I gained back 10 pounds over the last month. I’m excited to see them gone for good.

Thanks for being there, y’all. I’m gonna need ya.

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#19

how’s it going?

#20

Thanks for asking! I’ve had good days and bad days, but thankfully more fasting days than refeeding days. I’m still maintaining an open-ended goal of eating when I truly feel I need to (but not when I’m clearly just making an excuse to), and that has been working well for me! However, I feel like I’m ready to try another 30+ day fast now - just as long as I don’t think about it. Hahaha

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