Hi all! I’m Bex (Yes, it’s a nickname. Not cool enough to have a “X” in my name). I’ve been stalking the forum for a few weeks now and decided to finally be an active member of the community. I guess I will follow Yasemin’s format and introduce myself. This will show my age but… I’m getting some serious Xanga and LiveJournal vibes from this hahaha!
My WHY and GOALS:
- Clothes are not fitting and I refuse to spend money when I have barely worn clothes in my closet
- Want to enjoy my family’s upcoming trips without feeling self conscious in pictures
- I’m traveling to Asia this summer and I don’t want to live up to the standard of the “fat American”
- I want to go back to eating sushi at least once a month without having a breakdown about what I’m eating while on a date with my boyfriend
- Lose the 27 pounds I gained this year. I’m currently down 10 pounds (Just Keto water weight, not actual fat) and I want to lose another 12 by the first week in April (52 days from now).
STRUGGLES:
I watched Yasemin’s YouTube videos and saw the success she had with fasting. I’ve been a BED sufferer for about a year now. For those of you who don’t know that means Binge Eating Disorder. I’ve counted calories since high school but never binged (no purging involved in this eating disorder FYI). It wasn’t until April of 2019 I started to binge. As the months went on it started to feel completely overwhelming. It was like having an out of body experience. I could see myself eating but couldn’t stop it. Or I would eat until I was full and then just keep going. I’m only 5’3 but I can eat more than a 6’ tall man. I’ve always had a big appetite and been slightly chubby. I lost the weight in college and became the thinnest I ever remember being. In April I was able to get back down to that college weight. Unfortunately, the restriction on what I ate drove me a little crazy and I’m pretty sure that’s what led to the binging. I also hurt my back in 2019 and was unable to walk let alone workout. The sedimentary lifestyle kicked in but my appetite was still raging on. So I packed 27 pounds onto my very tiny frame, sank into a deep depression and now I am mentally ready to tackle this and get better. My back is still messed up, but is getting better with therapy. Since I can’t counteract my calorie intake with exercise, I need to get a handle on the nutrition side of things.
GAME PLAN:
Eating Keto with a mix of IF and water fasting. Like previously stated I have a large appetite and eating the 1200 calories I’m supposed to isn’t a realistic daily goal. I still feel hungry and it leads to binges when I restrict my calorie intake so extremely. I would rather fast and eat 1500-1700 calories on my feed days. I’m trying to fast 36 hours 3 days a week to “practice” fasting again. I want to move up to 48 and then 72 and then eventually a 5 day water fast. (I teach 180 13-year-olds and I’m really worried I won’t have the energy or patience while fasting 
HOW I FEEL / FUTURE VISUALIZATION:
I am nervous. I joined the community because I don’t know anyone in “real” life that lives by a fasting lifestyle let alone extended water fasting. My longest fast to date is 42 hours. I know that if I could just block out the mental portion of my hunger that I could get to my goals SO much faster and start living my life for something other than food and weight loss. I am looking forward to the confidence and comfort I will get from reaching my goals (being able to button my jeans and let my boyfriend put his hands around my waist without feeling self pity for my stomach rolls).
DAILY AFFIRMATION:
I am stronger than my cravings; desires are only temporary.
Ok there’s my soul lol. I’m ready to shed this fat and develop willpower!!
