Hi all, my name is SJ. I’m 25 years old and I feel like I’ve wasted my life thus far. I no longer have any close friends and the relationship I was in throughout high school and a bit of college, well I guess he freaking hates me now. I don’t really know why though; pretty sure he was the one who sabotaged our entire relationship.
So, any ways, I’ve always been shy because I thought people were judging me based on my weight. Because of this, I missed out on having a fun undergraduate experience, friends, opportunities, and so much more. I sought out my alma mater’s mental health professionals and that was a significant turning point for me in a positive way.
One time the psychiatrist called me to tell me that my blood pressure was 165/100 (not for sure about the diastolic, but it wasn’t normal) and told me that I had to come back in immediately. I figured it was due to the stress of school.
My blood pressure has run high from then on. So, this is one of the numerous reasons why I wanted to lose weight. I’ve tried low calorie, juicing, clean eating, and keto. Nothing has worked for me. I began to think that losing weight was some big conspiracy theory that everyone was in on.
So, after testing for elevated liver enzymes once again (I have psoriasis and now take a biologic, so I get routine lab monitoring), one boring night I stumbled upon Yasemin’s YouTube page and it seemed like solid advice.
The first fast I did ~March 1 was for 4 days. Second fast which started this past Monday lasted for 3 days. I caved because I’m still working very hard on self-control. I’ve found that fasting is probably the best method for me.
On my first fast I had my blood pressure taken and it was dam near normal. I’ve never had a normal reading! I almost asked the nurse to check it again. Unfortunately, it went back up but at least witnessing a change will encourage me because there’s nothing like working your ass off and not seeing any results.
Here’s me: I listen, listen, and listen to other people’s problems and tend to try and solve them all. I hardly every open up and when I try, I can’t express exactly how I feel so I’m rambling on this forum but it’s nice to get all of this out of my own head for once. If you’ve stayed with me this entire rant, thank you.