Jan. 9th 2020
Intro
Hello there 
I’ve struggled with my weight & body image practically my whole life. I never felt as thin as my classmates growing up- I was not obese by any means but definitely had some baby chub- which other kids were quick to let me know. I started my first “diet” when I was 9… which at that age to me meant only having one sweet per day. As I grew older & have learned more about health & nutrition I have had many high & low weight fluctuations… the pants in my closet range from 27-30’s… this yo yo lifestyle has caused me to become a binge eater- were I will eat eat eat telling myself “today is the last day tomorrow my diet starts” which has continued to end poorly. Leaving me sad, ashamed & self isolating when my clothes are too tight… 5 months ago my husband & I got married… I was down to 130 pounds, this morning I was 149.2… that’s beyond ridiculous & the exact results one would expect from my downward spiraling binge fest. This has left me feeling horrible & alone & definitely not a sexy newlywed.
Why
I am doing this because I feel sad. I feel lonely. I hate that nothing fits how I like & even my undies have gotten tight. I hate looking in the mirror & I’m sick of only wanting to wear leggings & making excuses to why I don’t want to go out. My husband wants to start having children soon & all I can think to myself is if I don’t get this weight gain under control pregnancy will not be graceful nor as healthy as I would hope. I want to love myself. I want to love my body & feel happy & energized again. I want to go back to the gym like I used to without feeling anxiety because I’ve gained weight. I need to be happy, healthy- physically, emotionally, & mentally before I commit to creating another life. I need to better myself so I can give the world my best self.
Long Term and Short Term Goals:
Long term goals- get to 115-120 pounds before having a child
Short term goals- make it through a three day fast! Also get back to 130
What are some struggles you face or you have faced in the past
Skipping social events. Not being my best self. Not being a sexy confident wife I want to be. Being angry & upset. Literally hating myself & continuing to make it worse by binging & isolating more…
** What is your game plan?**
Stop eating tonight by 9pm to start my water fast… go for at least three days. See how I feel & either re feed on a low carb meal & start into another three day fast ooooor seeing how I feel possibly continue on to see how long I can fast for.
How do I feel right now?
Scared I will fail myself.
How will I feel once I achieve my goal?
Like my self again.
Happier. More bubbly & excited. Fun to be around. Confident & sexy.
Daily Affirmation
I can do hard things. I have all the tools & power already within me to reach my goals. I will reach my goal weight & not only look but feel amazing. I will be happy to live again. I will love myself. I will become myself again, the new & improved, stronger, healthier, happier version. I will strive to reach my full potential.
for help when you need it.
with a tiny bit of cream. 
I know that’s not a true water fast but I’m hoping it won’t affect my results too much.
