Kyle's Journal

[Kyle]

Goodmorning Friends and Happy MLK Day.

I think MLK is the example we should all be impacted by… such an amazing soul. RIP.

So, it’s been a week since my last update. This morning, I am 146 lbs. The scale is IN FACT steadily moving downward but it is not by accident. I have become very routine in my habits and disciplined in my choices. Like everyone else says… there’s no magic pill or super quick fix. Even with fasting. This has to be a lifestyle change and I’m continuing to change my lifestyle. It is HARD at first. The first two to three weeks were the most mentally challenging for me… but I am not battling my mind now, as I was before.

One of the things I have decided to go back to is my Whole Milk, Splash of Heavy Cream, cinnamon powder lattes. They are a major indulgence for me that I allow almost each day. But I have totally given up sugar in nearly every form and processed foods. No more candy bars or donuts (even “keto” friendly sweets and sweeteners are off my meal list). In order to accomplish my goals, sacrificing is part of the deal, otherwise, I get to stay put and feel miserable about it.

I am still sticking with OMAD. My fasting typically last between 20 and 27 hrs per day. I usually have a one hour window to eat my one meal and latte. Start the clock and go again. An example meal for me would be a 1/2lb cheeseburger patty (no bun) and bowl of chicken tortilla soup (had that on Friday) and my indulgent Large Latte.

Hope everyone is well… I will check in again next week and catch up on a few journals.

Have a great week! You got this!!

SW- 169lbs
CW-146lbs
GW-128lbs
Total Loss so far= 23lbs

EDIT to ADD: @Stacia we need an update, Girly! Don’t leave us in 2021.

[Miramar]

Awesome job!

I’m shooting to drop 10 by next month to get my arse back into the 170’s, and carry on with goal of 2lbs a week and hope to see my goal by my one year anniversary here. Although, if I get into the size 12’s and they feel right I may not need to go so low. It’s been so long since I’ve been that low of a weight (2007) that my body may look totally different this time around.

Consistency definitely helps.

[Stacia]

Hi Kyle !! Great post above from you ! So awesome on the quitting sugar and the 23 pounds … proud of you girl ! We are making some progress since August when I first joined, makes me smile big !! I’ve been thinking of you and always look forward to your posts. I’m still here reading daily … I (unlike you ) have not slowed down my screen time … it’s just so fun ( probably addicting really) to me but I should concider spending more time moving this body for more exercise instead of sitting here scouring the internet !! I’ll start thinking about that … Love ya and hugs as always !!

[Kyle]

Good morning Everyone!

So, my weight today is up but my clothes are getting looser and I’m still pretty strict (although I might need to cut back on my Large daily latte to a smaller size, it’s indulgent), so I decided to take measurements. The last time I took measurements was Dec. 8. Here’s the results

Waist today DOWN 2.5 inches
Chest today DOWN .5 inches
Hip today DOWN 1.5 inches
R Arm today DOWN 1 inch
L Arm today DOWN .5 inch
R Thigh DOWN 2.5 inches
L Thigh Down 1.5 inches

Total Inches Lost since Dec 8, 2020 - 10 Inches

Also my BF percentage is down from 36% to 35% this a.m. Going for 25% (need to start working out!)

SW- 169lbs
CW- 148lbs
GW- 128lbs

That’s the newest update… Still going, still motivated and looking forward to a GREAT Spring!!!

Going to check out your journals now!! Happy Monday, everyone.

[Stacia]

Woo hoo Kyle!! This is awesome ! I love measuring inches too, seems to go faster than weight and helps with motivation !! So happy for ya … let’s keep going and soon we’ll reach our goals !! have a great week!!

[Kyle]

Good morning everyone!
I thought I checked in last week… but just realized I didn’t!

This morning my weight is 144lbs. I will be taking measurements in two more weeks to see where I’m at with that. I have been staying pretty consistent. Yesterday being SB Sunday, I really wanted a layered Refried Bean Dip and Tortilla Chips for my meal… I went to the store put everything in my cart, THEN… I put it all back. I decided to have low carb Taco MeatBalls instead. I’ve been working too hard to go backwards now and I think had I made the (very high carb) bean dip and chips I would have slid down that slippery slope. So, I’m glad I didn’t. There’s a constant refining of choices being made in order to change my lifestyle. The taco meatballs were really good… not bean dip good… but still good. Today is “kind of” a fasting day for me. I’m going to have a coffee + cream and that’s all. I have dinner plans this week at a restaurant I adore with a friend I haven’t seen since I was almost 170lbs… so I want to look my best!! Don’t know that I’ll hit 140… but hoping to be very close!

SW- 169lbs
CW- 144lbs
GW- 128lbs

Anyway… That’s my update. I’m going to check out journals now. Hope everyone is doing well with fasting and feeding (hint hint… proper Feeding is 90% of the journey).

[Stacia]

So proud of you sister for putting the chips back !! That’s major … I think I’ve only managed to do that twice over the years as usually if I am at the store in binge mode it’s over. Great job !! … I hope the dinner out with the friend was fun and you felt like the beautiful girl you are!! We are moving forward and making progress from when we started here, proud of us!! woo hoo ! Love ya girl !

[Kyle]

Good morning Friends! (adding some GIF’s to keep it interesting)

Holy Cow it has been almost a month since I last checked in. I had a health scare over the last few weeks that really messed me up, mentally. I had spent part of February and beginning of March w/doctors, testing and ultimately a procedure to resolve what was ailing me. My symptoms started in December but I ignored ignored ignored until it was so bad, I could not ignore it anymore. Let me say, WebMD is NOT YOUR FRIEND when you are going through something like this. I was rather certain I would not make it to the summer and I needed to get all my affairs in order (I also started planning).

Something else I learned, was as much as it makes sense to prioritize your health in a situation like that, the thing I chose to do was seek comfort in COMFORT food (even though I had major digestive issues).

My aunt passed away last year from cancer and I kept telling her to “fast” and offered advice on how she ate. She ignored all of that, and I understand it now. The places your mind goes can be very dark and mustering the optimism to take charge of your health is a real challenge.

Anyway… LONG story Short… Ultimately, the procedure last week has resolved my health scare and I will need to be more proactive in addressing early symptoms sooner. Almost immediately, after my doctor came back with positive news, a burden was lifted and I truly felt I had a new lease on life. I recognized I still need to “get my affairs” in order and get busy LIVING.
I started making plans for myself and what I want to do w/my life (which is something I haven’t done in over a decade). This goes way beyond weight-loss. I am going to build a good life for myself and make sure my kids are taken care of when my time DOES come.

Now onto the fasting/weight situation! I have GAINED (shocking ) weight. As of this morning, I’m at 152. I’m actually not concerned, as I know exactly what led to the gain and I know exactly how to correct that. Working on that now.
Starting TODAY, I’m back to OMAD and Lower Carb meals (under 50g). I truly feel better with this routine. In addition to better choices w/my meals, I will begin my resistance training again. Something I have been very lax about over the years. My body is 45 years old… the decline WILL continue and I’m just going to embrace the uphill battle for what it is and get going. I’m finally tired of wasting my time.

Reconciling, you are knocking on death’s door, will do that to you. Sometimes we need a drastic wake-up call.

So, thats my Very-Long, Overdue update on what has occurred over the last month w/me. I hope you are all succeeding with your goals and look forward to checking out some journals.

SW- 169lbs
CW- 152lbs
GW- 128lbs (but HEALTHY is most important!)

[Stacia]

Kyle ! I’m glad you’re ok! That sounds super scary! And you are right that would definitely put things in perspective!! God is with you my friend and guiding you every day so know that all that must of happened for a reason. … I’ve missed ya !! And thank you for all the memes… I love them !! Gosh, no worries on the few pounds gained, it’ll come off in no time! And you’re still at a good weight . You asked how I am, thank you for asking … all is well… been kinda introverted… I read all new posts everyday but just laying low myself … I’ve mostly been liquid fasting (Keto shakes) for a few days at a time and then an OMAD and then a few more days liquid fasting … it’s actually nice because there is no suffering … water fasting is hard!! I’m still no glutten and sugar !! Woo hoo … been since October 19th for those so pretty stoked on that. Love ya sister … please keep coming back and keep us posted !!

[Kyle]

So proud of you for sticking with your plan. Water Fasting IS hard… Personally I have found I do much better on Omad or some sort of ‘no sugar- liquid fast’ instead of prolonged fasting. For me, the prolonged fasting nearly always leads to a binge cycle and I have no desire to cultivate that for myself.
I’m so glad you checked in. Don’t allow yourself to get too “introverted”… as in isolated. I know how that can be and can be difficult to climb out of. Please stay connected w/your friends or on here… or whatever you feel comfortable with.
I know you had started a new medical regimen with your doctor making some adjustments not too long go. How is that going for you?
I start back on Birth Control Pills next week for the first time in 6 years. I am not looking forward to that adjustment (as I remember how badly it sucked when I started in 2001) but had I been on them for the past 6 years, I would not have encountered the severe issues I ended up having the past couple of months. I actually don’t gain weight on BCP, so that’s one plus, I’ll keep you posted if I notice any other positives. I think I have mentioned before but I have had PCOS since I was 21.
I’m a little concerned for Kristy. I know she had mentioned a possible move, so perhaps thats why she’s been MIA but I miss seeing her thoughtful posts on here. Hope we see a check-in from her soon.
I always think about you and your kiddos and single-momhood for you in Portland. If you were in FL, I would say lets go grab a Keto Shake and catch up on the regular. It’s good to spend time w/your tribe! You sound well and I hope that continues to be the case for you. Miss you lots!

Will be checking in more frequently now that I have the Bad news behind me.

[Stacia]

What a thoughtful post Kyle, , thank you!! I also have PCOS, diagnost when 16 (crazy periods and acne - oh joy - lol)… I was on birth control pills for 10 years, got off of them when I got married because I always heard with PCOS fertility is a huge problem. I got pregnant the first month with twins! I always thought the pills kept my body in check all those years to have a healthy pregnancy. Yes, I started thyroid meds - Super low dose. It’s been 1 month. I do feel a little more energy so that’s nice but will see what the months bring!!

I’m just so happy you are ok!! PCOS can lead to type 2 diabetes, heart disease, etc. so we have to be careful with our diet and habits. For years I worried about being able to have kids and not gaining weight (huge symptom of pcos) and weirdly I didn’t have either of those but now that I’ve put on weight and getting older I’m realizing PCOS is a lifetime problem beyond just having kids!!

I too wish Kristy would check in, and Miramar too !! I love reading everyone’s posts everyday … it’s inspiring to read successes and also feel not so alone with the daily struggles we all have !!

I would definitely have a meet up day with you if we were closer!! You’re a gem sister, I hope we both keep checking in here for years to come (providing Yasmin keeps this forum )… Thanks too for the keeping social reminder, my comfort zone and being an introvert is my go to but I have a best friend I see all the time and check in with texts so not on my worst behavior …

Keep up the health goals love, as long as today we make good choices that’s good progress!!

Hugs !!! thank you!!!

[Stacia]

Girl! You are in my prayers for sure !! . I’m sure you’re fine, so often it seems doctors go above and beyond just to be sure … I guess it’s a good thing … it’s the waiting game that’s tough, mid April? Sheesh … i hope they get you in sooner just so you don’t have to think about this … keep positive and keep us posted. Hugs my friend !!

[Diana]

Thank you for sharing, Kyle and Stacia. Reading your journal makes me feel we are connected and going through similar emotions/experiences to overcome ourselves. I am also a single mum of two boys and have been using food as a source of pleasure of my life. But short-term pleasure does not equal for a long-term happiness!! And the long-term happiness is what I am after!!
I started my 21-day fast yesterday and I am not Day 2 which is already remarkable because I have been struggling to get past Day 1 for a long time.
Food and wine was calling me yesterday but I remembered an euphoria feeling on the Day 8 of my last fast, feeling so young, happy and full of LIVE , LOVE and ENERGY!! I want this feeling now MORE than I want food. I am going to experience it again, it is just a matter of time. FOCUS on WHAT YOU WANT LONG-TERM and keep it in mind when you struggle. This is called self-love. I got to the point that I avoided looking at myself in the mirror because i didn’t like what I saw. Yesterday I did look at myself and found something I liked and gave myself a high-five! So find compassion, kindness and LOVE for your beautiful self EVERY DAY!
I also mediate in the morning and evening and it feels like ‘going home’ and makes me so peaceful and happy. I hope you could find meditation for you too to re-fill your soul with life energy, Prana. Sending you love & light xxx

[Kyle]

@Stacia Thank you, my friend! I KNOW you are right.
I think you can read my mind!!
I have had my doctor for about twenty years, the man has been practicing for over 40. I know he’s so good at what he does and he’s always a calming force for me. I feel very confident in his care. The whole “waiting game” is the suckiest (is that a word?? )part. I’m going to call the imaging center a few days next week to see if they have cancellation appts I can get into. If not, I’ll call my Dr on Wednesday afternoon and see what strings he can pull to get me moved up. He has hospital privileges, so worst case, I know he can get me an appt at the hospital to get the scans done sooner (if we need to). He’s the type of doctor who cares about my emotional well-being in addition to my physical health. After each appt, we sit in his office and discuss all the happenings in my personal life, with my kids, stressors and if I have questions et. I have only known one other physician that cared for their patients in the same way, so I’m blessed to have him as my doc. It’s gonna work out. Love you, Girl.

@Diana SINGLE MOM’S OF BOYS UNITED!! I have such a heart for moms in general but I have a very special place for the moms of boys and ESPECIALLY single mom’s of boys. We are in a unique club for sure!! Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. We can def relate to the lifestyle of raising boys in addition to GIVE ME ALL THE PASTA and sweets to make it through the day!! Congrats on your extended fast! Getting through day 1 is a big hurdle… and you are on Day 2! You can do this. I love the feeling of getting through those longer fasts. Impressive work, lady. Look forward to keeping up w/your journey.
I love what you said about meditation. Every night, after my son goes to sleep I spend about thirty minutes in prayer. It’s my “solace” time and chance to unload my worries of that day and I often think about people that don’t always cross my mind. Gives me a chance to reflect on all the love I have in my life. I am convinced it helps me sleep better just to spend time thinking about it, letting it all go and showing gratitude for everything in my life.
So glad you are here and on this journey with the rest of us!! xoxox

For this weekend, I have decided not to think about the things I have zero control over and just enjoy some time with my kiddo. I hope you all have a WONDERFUL weekend, fasting… or not!

[Stacia]

Thank you for your post Diana!! I loved it. The comments on Long Term, self love and the encouragement about meditation really resonated with me!! I think often about my chi and prana and how dark, sluggish and dim it all is when I binge. The times when I’m eating lite and deep breathing and standing tall I feel basically a mixture of peace/calmness and being on fire . I too want long term !! The short term is good for the first few bites… although I have come to the conclusion that the craving I feel when stressed is I want to feel numb, sleepy, full, calm and food does it. I’ve realized when stressed now I freaking don’t know what to do?! I pray and try and deep breathe but you mentioning meditation and feels like “going home”… that’s what I need !! I’m going to encorporate that into my life !! Thank you ! So happy too that you saw some beauty in the mirror !! You are a strong, beautiful girl with powerful energy and never forget that. We all are !!

Yes Kyle and I being single moms to two boys each definitely bonded us right off that bat … … we get your life sister, feel free to share any struggles I’m sure we’ve been through it. And the turning to food to cope, oh boy, I get that 100%. Of course we are extremely blessed to each have beautiful, smart, awesome sons, I feel like I won the lottery even on the toughest days. … hugs to you Diana!! Thank you for sharing !!

[Stacia]

Beautifully said Kyle !! . And how lucky you are for your doctor !! The spending personal time is so rare (if not unheard of!)… what a blessing. You’re in my sister !!

[Miramar]

Hello!