I’m sorry you are feeling poorly. I wish I spoke as eloquently as you do. You are really a marvel at expressing yourself, such a gift.
Thank you for sharing with us and you will be in my prayers. 
Kristy's Journal
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Starting to feel a bit better but my sinuses are still yucky. One day I feel much better and the next day horrible. Can’t seem to pinpoint any reason. I’ve come the the conclusion that I can be in pain or be hungry but not both simultaneously. Not really in ketosis. I was very pleasantly surprised to get on the scale and see that I didn’t gain or lose any weight! I think I’ve hit my set point and it will take some shaking things up when I’m feeling a bit better to get the ball rolling again.
Unfortunately my primary care dr is out this week so I can’t get a referral to an ENT dr until Monday at the earliest.
This will be my and my middle brother’s first Thanksgiving away from home. He isn’t the most communicative or emotive person but we know he feels deeply and how much he cares. It’s been interesting watching him ask for all the family recipes and hoping to recreate our traditional meal in lock down (he’s in California).
This is also the first thanksgiving where I didn’t have to bake tons (sometimes thousands) of pastries… It was very nice!
I hope everyone is able to stay safe!
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I felt horrible yesterday. Had to take the serious pain meds. Completely out of ketosis now. I will apologize to and thank my husband today. I wasn’t the most pleasant person to be around yesterday. Sometimes when I’m feeling that poorly I’m not able to effectively communicate or ask for specific types of help.
Spent a good portion of yesterday resting and on Zoom with my family.
Eating a lot more dairy than I would like. Do not have many fresh veggies in the house. Hungry all the time but nothing sounds good. I may want to consider going mostly vegan again. I know dairy can mess with my sinuses. We’ll see what the ENT says.
Sending all my unadulterated puppy love to all of you. Every time I get a puppy smooch I hope everyone can experience that love!
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Have completely gone off keto and have been eating refined carbs for the first time since February. Although all emotions have a purpose, I’m not one to feel shame about food. I think the chronic pain/illness, loneliness, and not being able to exercises are staring to affect my mood. Especially with whatever physiological changes need to be addressed with my dr’s.
At first nothing sounded good to eat because I felt physically bad. Now nothing sounds good to eat because of the physical and emotional. Like everyone, I have a serious case of pandemic fatigue.
I’ll go on keto again. But I’m not going to get caught up in thoughts about the future or past. Since I am hungry all the time I’m not even really able to fast. This isn’t something that is part of sense hunger: eye, ear, touch, mouth, or heart. I am literally waking up during the night in pain from being hungry. My pain is also exponentially worse when I’m hungry. I haven’t experienced anything like this before and if anyone has had a similar experience I would love to hear your story!
See the ENDO on Friday and will get a referral to an ENT tomorrow.
My mood has drastically changed and I’m trying not to be passive aggressive. With few outlets I’m not managing my emotions effectively through mindfulness alone. It is time to ask for help. I’ve told my husband I’m suffering, apologized for my mood, and thanked him for all his support but I do not “feel” this is enough. He is a tremendous help and is beyond gracious, humble, and loving. No one is responsible for these emotions except me and I don’t want him to be as overwhelmed as I am.
I’m loving everyone’s journals right now and am rooting for all of you! I’m worried about @Miramar since she hasn’t posted in a while.
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I just splurged on a gowise combo unit that will do dehydration, air fry, rotisserie, etc and a food saver thing.
My BIG splurge if I had room for it in my apartment would be a freeze dryer. There’s a place that sells them now for the home. Been eyeing that for over a year now. Would need some huge space adjustments in my apartment for it.
So sorry you were feeling ill for a bit! You’ll fall back into things - no rush. I know I like to beat myself up when my plan goes way off course (like it did the past few weeks) so I’m focusing on how much progress I made instead.
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@Miramar Yay! So glad you’re back and doing well! Oh my a freeze dryer… drool. Seeing as I have all the equipment for a professional kitchen that sounds like something I’d want to add to my collection! But I’ll show restraint!
Woke up at 3 this morning in pain and ravenous. At this point I have no idea what is going on. I’m not a professional and can only speculate but I wonder if I should get my estrogen checked too. My period was all sorts of messed up the last couple of months and I am hyper- emotional. I’m usually pretty sensitive but able to cope and put things in perspective. Now I’m all over the place. I’ve spent most of my life practicing “how” to suffer. This new phase/whatever threw me a curve ball that I am trying, moment by moment, to be present with.
An odd side effect of my sinus issues is that everything smells like cigarette smoke. This has happened before when I’ve had sinus issues. I have never smoked. I wonder if because my smell/ taste is off that is another reason why no food seems appetizing? Still eating carbs and no fasting window. I feel pretty gross because of the carbs but it will pass.
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https://www.amazon.com/Harvest-Right-Freeze-Dryer-Dehydrator/dp/B07H9FYYCH Look how cute this is.
I just went to the harvest right site and appears they don’t have the color ones anymore but maybe that’s temporary.
Just over 2k though.
For now I’ll deal with my fermenting, dehydrating, and food sealing.
Struggling with rearranging my kitchen as I type this. On the verge of talking myself into doing something drastic. The measuring tape is getting a workout today.
Meanwhile, I didn’t get the pea soup going and may be able to talk myself into just fasting through to tomorrow.
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@Miramar Wow that is one cool piece of equipment! Looks like it only does small batches though. So tempting!
Finally got an appointment with the ENT and will go for my CT scan later this week. I’m still eating refined carbs. I know they are not making me feel physically better. At this point I’m just going with the flow. I’m waking up at least once every night ravenous and have to take pain meds. I know pain meds effect my hunger levels but this started before I started taking the meds soo… I dunno.
Listening to an amazing book and trying not to ruminate on the pain. Drinking tons of fluids (mostly tea). I feel so blessed to be a part of this community.
My middle brother’s birthday is on Christmas. Since he moved to California, and will not be coming home for the holidays, this will be the first year I haven’t made his birthday pastry. I’m an amazing pastry chef and always bring out my A game for his birthday making something better and fancier each year (always have to show off for my family). I usually spend a small fortune and countless hours making this treat. I don’t think it’s really appropriate to post details of what I made last year (food triggers) but I can say that I made individual life size bobble ornament shaped entremets that I decorated with gold leaf. So I’m on the hunt for an acceptable Patisserie in his area to have them make something special. I’ve found 1 but it’s in San Fran. I have a friend out there I might be able to get to pick up and deliver a special order, though. Looking at these decadent desserts is VERY tempting! I have no desire to bake yet but know I will want to again someday. Will never own my own Patisserie again, though. Way way too much work!
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Is it possible to make something, put in dry ice and ship? Or some cookie bars or something that can be sealed?
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Unfortunately not! I know I would love to make some simple cookies or something that could be shipped but I don’t have any of my equipment to even make those.
I wish I could post photos!
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Please everyone send me some healing vibes. Something is wrong and I’m suffering. I’m seeing dr’s but getting appointments with specialists during the holidays and with my husband’s schedule is difficult. I don’t know if I’ve ever been this hungry before. My body hurts everywhere. I’m waking up every couple of hours in the night in so much pain and HUNGRY. But I’m also nauseous, gassy, and bloated (probably from carbs). Will try to eat keto today. I’m having to take my anti-nausea meds again.
Something is just plain not working properly. Will see if I can get my estrogen levels tested tomorrow. Thanks for everyone’s support! I feel like this post was a giant pity party but I need help and am trying to cultivate patience and resolve while we figure out what system/s are deciding to stop working this time.
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It sounds like your body is working extremely hard to sound the alarm and fight against whatever is going wrong. Unfortunately, you are being pummeled in the crossfire 
I am sending you vibes of strength and tenderness (and swiftness and clarity to your medical team)!
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Yikes 
!
Sending soothing vibes.
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Thanks everyone for the healing vibes! Endo switched up my meds and it will take 6-8 weeks to see things even out and do more test. Cultivate the patience!
CT showed my sinuses are all messed up again and will probably need another surgery. I’ll need a dr to put the camera up my nose first but it’s a small price to pay. To be honest I’d prefer surgery rather than needing to take more long term medication! Going under anesthesia is kinda traumatic because I’ve been under at least 15 times. Every time I get this weird taste in my mouth. Still better than meds.
Still hungry more than usual and have to take pain meds every 4ish hours but I don’t need as much food to satiate me. I’ve gained 10lbs in the last month. I think a majority of it is water weight because of the 2 week carb fest. I’m not concerned about it. Trying to eat as keto as possible. Ketone levels seem to be associated more with when I eat rather than what.
Very plugged up from meds and carbs so I’m going to drink some smooth move to get the ball rolling so to speak.
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That Yawn!! 
3 NSV! I felt better yesterday than I’ve felt in ages. Was the first day in a while that I didn’t have to take prescription pain meds. Facial pain was down and I could kinda breathe through my nose! Also some lab work came back that was encouraging. I was also able to fast for 12 hours yesterday!
The “smooth move” tea didn’t do anything and I’m still very plugged up. Will try again today. Did lose 5ish lbs. Obviously water weight.
TMI- Since my husband got snipped last month and my IUD comes out/expires in a couple of weeks I’m going to call my dr and see if I can get the pill for a couple of months until we can confirm the hubby can’t get me preggers. It would be my luck to get preggers if we didn’t take precautions at first. Since I could get preggers (but due to health issues could not have a baby and have us both live to tell about it) I don’t want to take ANY risks.
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Still feeling much better! Woke up in da middle of the night and had to take meds and eat some food. Have had to eat this morning too.
I’m super on the fence about going home for Xmas. I know my parents would be heartbroken but it’s also better than anyone getting sick or worse. Have until the 23rd to decide.
.7mmol today. If I do go home for Xmas it would be a carb extravaganza. Not looking forward to that. Smooth move got things going yesterday and I feel much better. Not sure if my digestion is up for many veggies yet but I got some lettuce and will try to have a salad later!
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