Day 13 / Busted my ass today on the concrete job with Hubz. This time I could not lift the 80 lb bags at all, so now I know I am steadily getting weaker. I added bone broth today to begin the process of waking up my digestive system. Tomorrow is 14, and I’ll have veg soup and later in the night Iwant to eat some salmon with him for Father’s Day. And I surely need my strength for the rest of the concrete project. We only have 2 parts of 12 done. Long road ahead. I will stay low cal, low carb so I feel no guilt for beginning the refeed early. I killed it and I am down 19 lbs in 13 days. Cheers Water Warriors! I feel accomplished todayyyyy, cannot believe I did it!
Journaling in the Mile High
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You go 
you have accomplished a lot, feel good…enjoy your refeed!!
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Congrats on sticking with it. Have a Happy Father’s Day!
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Happy Fathers Day to you!
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Checking in. Staying low carb 16:8. Only put 4lbs of water weight back. So far so good. Headed out to the lake for overnight camping, that will turn into 3 days I’m sure of it. Already prepared my pals to not tempt me with any burgers and brats.
I packed curry chicken, kale salad, cucumbers (instead of chips) yogurt dill dressing. Won’t be able to substitute the vodka with anything hehe, and I can’t account for the shot times that my nutzoid friends will share, but I’m ready for some stupid crazy fun in the sun. We The People, Like to Party 
Cheers!
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Okay! Back at it again. Readying my mind and body for another fast. Our 21st Wedding Anniversary is coming up, so I am going to do a short fast this week.
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This is really bad to start off with, but I am keeping it semi transparent. I am starting to smoke heavy again. I had the BEST ever morning and then the worst 7 hrs of late. My anxiety has never been at the point of uncontrollable till today. Crying and repetitive negative thoughts. I prayed allll day, while stranded in my truck, for a bad outcome. I am journaling so I have to post the days as they come. I did make it through Day 1 fast, until I got home and fixed myself a vodka and soda. The Hubz is out of town, so I am able to sit here and cry to myself and my besties listened to me bitch for awhile and that always helps. I’m sure they are working on their own cocktails and will call me later when their buzzes are more fun to talk about. I am just rambling now. My dog, Oliver, somehow always knows when I am at the tip top level of my brain pain. He will not leave my side. Even after vodka, I feel in control. Why? Because I didn’t order a f. ing pizza, like I USED TO DO! Yes, the fast is broken technically, but I didn’t eat. Now, hmm, how to wallow in tears without vodka. ? I feel like I have a hold on my stress eating. But is it because I am so very angry right now??
Right now I just heard the most ANNOYING group of magpies squaking at each other like little mean bitches in the middle of my property. They were so loud, Oliver got up and barked. He never barks. …ever. Then I see a little bunny running down the dirt road like his tail was on fire. The magpies heard Oliver and those black and white, wannabe crow bitches took to the pines. Bye Felicias! Find a safe house lil bunny!
… Reminds me of a recent episode in my life. Glad I documented this. Maybe this sad scenario will make roots in me, when I read it later.
Hope I don’t stay up too late tonight.
Hope I stay fasting tomorrow.
Hope I find something nice to do for someone else very soon.
Hope I stand my ground and not let life’s problems grow into something bigger.
Hope I can learn to trust.
Hope I can forgive.
…Hope
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It’s all the ick revealing itself to you.
I wish I could give you a hug.
You’re self medicating the feelings with the vodka. But you know down deep that’s a temporary bandaid.
Cry, punch a pillow, drink some water, take a few deep breaths and relax.
You are strong. You are in control of everything going into your system.
Let the “ick” go. You don’t have room for that in your body. You can reprogram yourself.
Don’t beat yourself up. Learn the lesson, acknowledge the trigger, and devise a plan for it not to be an issue again.
Drink when you’re happy. 
They say, fail and fail fast. So you can find the quickest and smoothest path.
You can do this.
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Hope you feel better soon. Keep it up. You can do this!!!
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Well, the city was opening up and now they are closing things again. So frustrating. Might as well fast. I need to pick a date to start and stick to it.
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@H2Oat5280 I figure I’m going to look 20 years younger and like a super model by the time it’s safe to go back out 
.
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Heck yes! People won’t recognize you!
I’m Day 1 today…not sure how long I’ll go.
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Only got to the 3rd day.
Joined the next challenge July 16th will be day 1 …hoping the zoom calls will keep me in line. I am low carbing and low cal till then.
I am finally cutting out some people in my life that are toxic, really needing big changes right now.
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It’s another autophagy!
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Stayed low carb and low cal today…Ready for Day 1 of July 16th challenge tomorrow! Stickies ready.
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Have been so hard up to find some solid motivation, ugh. So here I am restarting yet again. I made it to the challenge call and by the end of it decided to go at it again.
Restarting my fasting app NOW. Go Monday. Cheers to Monday
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Is that a 7 day challenge? That’s 3 lbs lighter and some fine autophagy. You are in charge! Go girl!
Peel off another layer of your onion.
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You are always there for an amazing comment and I love you for it
I totally agree with you. Miramar is an awesome woman. She is so positive, and man, she has experiened the loss of ALL of her immediate family-mom, dad, and siblings. And she is such a funny person, so much humor.
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